The cocoon (childhood)

I am a war baby, born in Columbus Georgia, where my Father was in training in the Army before being sent to the European Theater in World War 11.  My Mother went to the hospital three times before I decided to appear on April 14.  We remained in Georgia until my Father was shipped out and my Mother and I returned to her home town, Louisville, Kentucky, for the duration of the war.

When my Father returned from the war, we moved to Springfield, Ohio, where he enrolled in Wittenberg, College.  He worked part-time and my Mother worked full-time to help put him through college.  I took piano lessons, tap, and ballet (you would think I would have more grace in movement).  After my Father graduated from college, he enrolled in the Lutheran Theological Seminary and became an ordained Lutheran minister in 1951.  During this process, I attended school in quoset huts, and spent the summers at my paternal grandparents farm in Wayne County.  Here I was the "Queen" with the three room summer house becoming my playhouse.  I alone, selected the patterned feed sacks.  It is with very fond memories of the farm harvests, seeing fox run, having my own haystack, and a Border Collie as my best friend.  These were some of the best and most carefree times I have ever had.

The one thing I did not like, was every Saturday evening, my Grandmother putting my hair in rag curlers for Sunday church services.  The curls may have looked great, but they surely hurt!  I sold Christmas cards to earn money to buy  my first two wheeler.

When my Father was ordained, he accepted a call to the dual parish of Doylestown/Marshallville, Ohio.  I loved it there where I so enjoyed school.  I can't remember ever NOT likeing school.  In 1954, my Father accepted a call to St. Paul's in Mansfield , Ohio.  I was now 11, and this would be my 7th move.  One of the things happening in that move, was a correspondence between me and the members of the new Sunday School class.  This is how I met my dear friend, Marilou, a friendship that is still strong after 51 years.  We went to lots of Saturday movies and made sure we attended lots of weddings in the church balcony (uninvited).  We both wish we had kept those first letters of friendship.

I had been an only child and still retain that personality.  However, when I was 14, my brother, David, was born.  A truly exciting event!  He is Downs Syndrome, but gives so much more in life than he receives.

I attended and graduated a girls school in Virginia.  We wore white gloves to dinner on Sundays, ate our doughnuts and spoonburgers (sloppy joes) with forks.  We attended dances at VPI, and tried to break as many rules as possible.  I applied and was accepted at Roanoke College in Salem, Virginia.  My Mother called on Sunday and told me I would be attending Wittenberg University instead.  This was a mistake, but at that time, I did not know how to advocate for myself.

The Larva (Early Adulthood)

I attended Wittenberg, majoring in History, English and TROUBLE.  I was a true P.B . (Preacher's Brat).  I left after two years and returned home seeking a way to leave and reconcile my thoughts and feelings to find something meaningful for me.  After dating several young men, I met one who had a million dollar smile and had lived the last 24 years in one house.  I thought, here is one who will stay put and not be constantly moving.  I convinced him to propose after four dates, and we were married and moved to Lakewood, Ohio.

I returned to college at Cleveland State University.  We bought our first home in Mantua, Ohio.  It was a century home on 5+ acres complete with barn and silo.  This is where we began our family.    Our first son, Joseph Peter Andrew, came home on the train with his father in August 1966.  He was 3 1/2 years old and waiting for love.

In January, 1967, our first biological child, Michael David Sean, was born.  Joe's younger brother, Mark Stephen Douglas, came home on the train in February, 1967.    Now we had three boys within six months.  My Mother was afraid to answer the phone!  Now started a series of moves with different jobs.  We never lived in one place 4 years.  Some places were better than others.

I renewed a friendship with Carrie, and we have been friends for 42 years.  In 1971, my daughter Erin Elizabeth Joy-Anne, was born.  I was so excited about this baby girl!  It was after her birth, I started to work again, but from my home.  I gave piano lessons.  I also began a new friendship with the Bannana, and she and I have been friends for 34 years.

One city I loved living in was Cedar Rapids, Iowa.  I loved the values. schools, cultural events there, and wanted to bring up my children there.  We were only there about 20 months.  I would have sold my soul to the devil to remain there.  Unfortunately, I was not given that option.  We moved four more times in the next 14 years and ended here in Columbus, Ohio.  We had moved 12 times in 16 years.  This took an incredible toll on our family.  The constant disruption of schools, the loss of friends, always being the new child/family.

My oldest son, Joe, had graduated from high school and joined the Navy, where he had the experiences of seeing many countries and wonderful things in the world.  He served on the U.S.S. Enterprise and the Bowen (which was the first ship to fire on Beruit, the first firepower in the Med since WWII).  He now lives Charleston, S. C. and works for the Holiday Inn.  He even survived hurricane Andrew.  

Michael graduated from Watterson and went to TCU, where he met his wife, Sarah.  He graduated, they married and he returned to SMU for his Master's Degree.  They spent a brief time in Atlanta, and then made the decision to return to Texas.  They live in Plano, have my wonderful Grandboys, Sam and Noah.  Michael works for Chase Bank.  Sarah is a writer, who contributes stories to "Boy's Life" and other magazines.

My daughter, Erin, graduated from Watterson and decided to adopt Columbus as her home and never plans to leave.  She received her degree from Columbus State and now works for Commerce National Bank.  She married Ed, who is a graphic designer, having graduated from CCAD.  Here I have Grandboys, Adam and Ryan.

I have great places to visit and my children make moving a non-option in their lives.

By 1985, I was frustrated and ran away from home.  I began self exploration to understand who I was, where I wanted to be, what I wanted to do, and acknowledge that I am O.K.  By 1991, my marriage was not a marriage any longer.  We got a dissolution which was quite painful, and a struggle in many ways for me.

The Butterfly (A New Life)

After my dissolution, I took the Butterfly as my personal symbol.  It means rebirth, freedom, and being beautiful.  I was fortunate in finding a grief therapist to work through the many losses.  I have had a wide variety of jobs due to moves, etc.  I have been a pre-school teacher, worked for the Franklin County Board of Mental Health, worked part time at Lazarus
Northland, an office manager for Ohio Thrift Stores, a store manager and team leader for New Uses General Store (part of Once Upon a Child).  I currently work for a floral design company.

After my dissolution, I was a member of the Divorced and Separated Group and facilitated many bookstudies for refocusing, rebuilding, and moving forward in life acceptance.  I dated again and had a great time and learned there are men of integrity and quality out there and marriage can be a wonderful and powerful thing.  I also learned it is good to be alone and that does not mean lonely.

I am truly blessed with family, friends, and life experience.  I have resolved my spiritual being (yes, I believe in angels).  I view and appreciate life differently as a Butterfly.  I so enjoy the unique women in this Red Hat group and am validated by each of you in the personalities, stories, courage, sensitivity, and the ability to move forward and still laugh and be silly.  I have learned it is o.k. to own my thoughts and feelings and I now have the courage to be ME!

Wishing each of you the warmest of holidays and the blessings of 2006.  A toast.....Good Health, Good Friends, Good Times, and find the wildest Red Hat Ever!!