I was born October 21, 1998. I hadn’t slept the night before due to an uncomfortable parting of ways with my boyfriend. I went to work but was too visibly shaken to be there. I asked to leave and went to my friend’s dorm room down at OSU. After pouring my heart out to her she looked at me and said “have you ever thought about talking to God about this?” I raised my head, looked her straight in the eyes and realized I hadn’t. As far as I was concerned God was equal to Zeus, just a story in a book. Was she telling me He was real? That He could really listen to my problems and was concerned for me? She opened a little brown book she had called My Utmost for His Highest. I wish I could say that I remember the scripture that she read, but I don’t. All I do remember is that it was instantaneous. At that moment I was born, I became a believer. And since that day nothing has ever been the same. My boyfriend and I did end up getting back together and married a little less than two years later. Jeremy has been an amazing man, most men would not want a questioning woman hanging around him, but he was willing to teach me all he could about the Word. If he couldn’t answer me we would go and pick up a book and read it together to strengthen our faith and knowledge.

I had become a Christian right after high school. I remember during my senior year there was a small moment of time when God was preparing me. Of course at the time I had no idea. But I will never forget my eyes. They were definitely not mine. I was taking a philosophy class and had openly proclaimed myself an atheist. Having heard all the reports given throughout the class on Christianity, Hinduism, Buddhism and Judaism I, again, figured it was all like the mythological creatures and chalked it up to folk tales. A way to entertain before television. But something strange happened. For a short time when I saw people I didn’t see what the world saw. I didn’t see a geeky scrawny little boy with ADD, instead I saw a hurt child just wanting to be loved and accepted. This happened with nearly everyone I saw. I am so sad that it didn’t last very long. It was amazing and life changing. To see people through their hearts was a gift I wish I still had. But I’m afraid to say that I have been steel scrubbed by the world and have hardened my own heart. I do hope that some day I can have that sort of grace again, I know I will. I just have to let go of any fears I’ve let others put in me.

A couple of years into our marriage we were blessed with a little girl. I was almost afraid we would never have children because a year previous I had prayed that God would give my children to my sister in law because she had been trying for years to get pregnant and I knew she would make an excellent mother. Thankfully God allowed both of our lives to be blessed and we both have two children and we are each expecting another within the next six months.